QUICKIES! Chicago
Posted on October 14, 2009 2 Comments
QUICKIES! Chicago – October 13, 2009:
JAC JEMC
ELIZABETH WYLDER
BEN TANZER
KATE DUVA
CAROLINE PICARD
AARON PLASEK GRAY
CASEY BYE
ZACH DODSON
RICHARD THOMAS
AARON BURCH
BLAKE BUTLER
AMELIA GRAY
Wow, so what a great night. I was thrilled when Mary and Lindsay invited me to read at QUICKIES! Chicago, but little did I know that I’d be part of this fantastic FUNdraiser and mini Dollar Store Tour event. GO here to their blog to get more information on QUICKIES! and all of the authors that read. QUICKIES! Chicago
For the second night in a row I hopped in my car and fought traffic to get to the city. Last night it was to the Inner Town Pub in Wicker Park (my old stomping grounds) only to find the bar empty, but for one barfly and the bartender. I guess 7 pm is only a suggested starting time. After conversing with several Columbia students, including Casey Bye who also read some awesome fiction, and Jacob from ACM, I realized that it never starts until almost 8. Oh well. Gave me time to hang.
Lots of great talent on hand. Our hostesses Mary and Lindsay were HILARIOUS and I loved their stories as well. They were totally prepared to blow the whistle at the 5 minute mark and had no problem escorting Aaron and Amelia off the stage mid-sentence. Didn’t matter that we were in the middle of a hot dildo story by Aaron or that Amelia was on fire spewing voracious insults at the crowd. HOOKED. And pulled.
I read my story that is up at Opium called “Animal Magnetism”. I mean, if you have a story that involves a guy getting an elephant penis, you have to read it. Right? It got some good laughs, and several people afterwards told me they really liked it, so I’m happy with the results. Stiff competition. I need to get my open mic mojo back.
Some of the highlights for me were the aforementioned Aaron Burch of Hobart. He’s always entertaining, and his story was funny and a bit sad, and somehow kind of hot. Amelia Gray was hilarious, her voice is one that I’m really getting into. Like I mentioned in my last post about the SCORCH ATLAS reading, she’s a great mix of sexy, dark, and funny. Wearing a tight black dress with fishnet stockings never hurts either. Blake Butler read another great story that was dark all the way up to the end, and then twisted into something bittersweet and funny. I’m really digging his style. Jac Jemc had a really strange and dark little story that I really loved. I’ll have to check out more of her work.
Thanks to everyone that chatted me up before, during and after. I had an excellent chat with Ben Tanzer, who also read. So many great local writers.
For sure check this event out if you can in the future. I had so much fun. Thanks Nik for the encouraging text, so very cool of you. And I got to meet a Cult buddy Golding (Gus Moreno) as well, thanks for coming out to see me read and support the group, such a cool guy Gus, and another really talented writer.
Peace,
Richard
SCORCH ATLAS by Blake Butler release party with Featherproof Books
Posted on October 13, 2009 2 Comments
So last night I fought traffic for an hour and a half to just barely get down to the SCORCH ATLAS book release by Blake Butler and Featherproof Books on time.
It was at No Coast Collective @1500 W. 17th St, Chicago so if you’re in the Pilsen area, check them out. I love Pilsen, they have a great arts fair in the fall. Lots of great books, posters, and music, tons of handmade stuff, very cool. Reminds me a bit of Quimby’s in Wicker Park.
Zach Dodson is the co-publisher/CD at Featherproof, he mcd the event, nice guy, I got to chat with him a bit about Featherproof and what they’re doing. I’ll send them my novel(s) when they open up again. He mentioned they’d like to get into some noir, so that’s cool.
Kathryn Regina started us off with some excellent poetry, a bit of the surreal and magical realism, involving a woman eating a car, eating pennies, good stuff. We chatted a bit before the show, very nice, quiet. So I knew her work would be some strange stuff. It’s always the quiet ones.
Sam Pink was next. Very funny, cool stuff. He’s a big guy with a shaved head, but really nice. Put a nice dent in the case of PBR, him and BB. He read off the back of a movie box, Lionheart I think, JVCD…duh. His work is really funny and strange. His book I AM GOING TO CLONE MYSELF THEN KILL THE CLONE AND EAT IT looks great, go buy it.
Amelia Gray flew up from Austin to read. She might have been my favorite of the evening. She read a new story, I canNOT remember the title, about hand jobs and a Chevy IROC, a guy named Carl (two actually) it was hilarious and dirty, good stuff. Had a nice chat with her after, bought a copy of AM/PM. Go get it. Yes Nik, she remembers you from Baltimore. She has a weakness for guys named Nik.
Blake Butler read some wild stuff. I didn’t know he was so dark! He read an excerpt from SCORCH ATLAS of course, which I bought. Something about a baby with mold dying and then a new baby a GIANT baby in the attic, it was very surreal. I liked it a lot, very tactile and rich. Got to talk with him before about his books deal and the state of various presses and the industry. Very nice guy.
Sorry I had to hop in the car back to the burbs right after, as Tiger Bones was sounding really good, lots of bass.
Great time, lots of fantastic writing. I’ll see most of these guys again tonight at the Quickies! FUNdraiser where I’ll be reading as well, at the Innertown Pub @ 1935 W. Thomas in Wicker Park. If you’re in Chicago, come on by.
LINKS to authors and presses over there on the blogroll.
Exquisite Corpse – Storming the Pushcarts at HTML Giant
Posted on September 30, 2009 1 Comment

Ran across a rather interesting little project over at HTML Giant http://htmlgiant.com/?p=15597 thanks to my friend Nik Korpon. I was out camping with the boy, our first trip doing such things, caught a fish, burned things, all a great time. But I came to the game almost too late.
NO COLONY http://www.nocolony.com/# and Blake Butler, a talented writer that is blowing up, offered up a Pushcart for $650:
PUSHCART NOMINATION: Want famous? Cock? $650 buys text publication plus an OH BOY Pushcart nomination and/or nude photos of someone’s mother.
Ryan Call and Shya Scanlon (of recent FORECAST 42 fame http://shyascanlon.com/) decided to start a thread asking for 65 people to jump in and write a story together. It took off. Pretty quickly it was filled up, and I snuck in at around 62. Nik got in just ahead of me, and after me Christopher Dwyer. Caleb just missed it, but somebody dropped out, so in the words of Heidi Klum “YOU’RE IN”.
This could be some sort of huge joke or quite possibly history in the making. I’m willing to toss out my 150 words and see what happens. Quite a lot of great writers, everyone I’ve mentioned so far, as well as some other names I’m getting to know – Nathan Tyree, Roxanne Gay, Ben Spivey.
I’m most interested to see what everyone writes, if there is a common thread, what stands out, what resonates. I have one idea so far, we’ll see if it still works at #62 or whatever I am. Something about this being a kind of LONG WALK but with words, death to the weak story, glory to the strong. We’ll see. I’ll keep you posted.
Peace,
Richard
Interview with Richard Thomas
Posted on September 29, 2009 Leave a Comment

Thought I would make sure this link was up here on a more glorious and permanent basis.
http://craigwallwork.blogspot.com/2009/01/interview-with-richard-thomas.html
Craig is a writer whose work I’ve really grown to love. I have in time published him in Colored Chalk (twice, Issue #6 – Waking Up Strange and Issue #9 -Heaven and Hell) as well as in Sideshow Fables (#1).
This was a lot of fun and always a bit revealing.
Peace,
Richard
Rotten Leaves
Posted on September 18, 2009 2 Comments
Well, I can’t even begin to say how excited I was to hear that Axel Taiari, Christopher Dwyer and Nik Korpon have launched a dark fiction publication. These are two of my favorite dark fiction writers. I’ll certainly be sending them work for the online AND print publications. Christopher has published a lot, and is in the upcoming SHADOW KINDRED along with Axel and me, as well as fellow Write Clubbers Caleb, Nik and Simon, not to mention Drew. We’ll get into that later.
These guys are powerful writers and I’m eager to see what they do. Be sure to submit and check them out as well. Kudos brothers.
Peace,
Richard
Dueling Columns – I’m all for Simultaneous Submissions
Posted on August 31, 2009 14 Comments
First of all, Larina and I are doing a dueling column on this issue. I am FOR simultaneous submission (the writer’s perspective) and Larina is FOR no simultaneous submission (editor’s perspective). You can read her column right here, and YES it IS the same WordPress site. Cute isn’t it? We’re like twins.
http://larina.wordpress.com/2009/08/30/simsubs/
I’ll post it again at the end of the column. Post up your thoughts, go read her column and do the same thing. But be nice. Okay?
SIMULTANEOUS SUBMISSIONS:
One author’s perspective
So, Larina (http://larina.wordpress.com/) and I are doing a little column debate here, a little pro and con, between the writer’s side of this story and the editor’s lofty, snotty, inconsiderate perspective. What? Biased? Of course I am. And I edit too for two publications (warning: first plug) http://www.coloredchalk.com and http://sideshowfables.com, but even so, I am violently in favor of ALL publications utilizing a simultaneous submission policy. There, I said it. And to those that are on the other side of the fence, I say BOLLOCKS, open up your doors, and understand what we are up against, out here in the cold, alone and pecking away, crying into our keyboards, pushing away the wife and kids screaming I MUST WRITE!.
WHAT IS SS?
Basically a simultaneous submission policy says that you may indeed submit your fantastic short story (or novel) to other publications BUT (and this is a BIG BUT, one that this policy hinges on I think) you MUST inform any other magazines or websites the minute you are accepted elsewhere. Why? Well, so they can congratulate you on your success, and pull your story out of the slush pile, and not waste any more time reading it, or running it up the corporate ladder for approval, or whatever it takes to break through.
STATISTICS
I’ll be putting up stats from http://www.duotrope.com, a fantastic site for finding markets and tracking submissions. Go use them now, and donate a couple of dollars too.
RESPONSE TIMES
There is a wide range of times that you can wait for an editor and publication to get back to you. Some of the fastest like Anderbo.com can do it in a day or two, same for Clarkesworld, a big publisher in the fantasy and sci-fi arenas. The FASTEST 25 at Duotrope end with #25 being seven days. That’s quick. Now, at the other end, take a look at this nightmare:
1. Sniplits (387 days)
2. Open City (280 days)
3. Doorways Magazine (252.6 days)
4. Saint Ann’s Review / tsarina (248.1 days)
5. Blackbird (243.5 days)
6. McSweeney’s Quarterly (221.8 days)
7. Another Chicago Magazine (201.1 days)
8. Fence (192 days)
9. Baltimore Review, The (187.1 days)
10. Ascent (184.9 days)
11. Public Space, A (181.8 days)
12. Rambler, The (180.8 days)
13. Coyote Wild (177.8 days)
14. Low Rent Magazine (176 days)
15. Chattahoochee Review (170.9 days)
16. Yale Review (170.4 days)
17. Blue Mesa Review (165.4 days)
18. Inkwell Journal (160.4 days)
19. Crab Orchard Review (156.3 days)
20. Antioch Review (151.8 days)
21. Harvard Review (150.2 days)
22. Gettysburg Review (147.5 days)
23. Crazyhorse (147.4 days)
24. Dark Recesses (147 days)
25. Indiana Review (145.1 days)
I’m still waiting to hear back from St. Ann’s and it has been over 400 days for one story and NO RESPONSE from the editors. Ever. Repeatedly.
There are some big names on here – McSweeney’s, APS, Antioch, Harvard, Crazyhorse. So let us say you are waiting on a top publication. I won’t even pick the longest one. Say an average of about six months, or 180 days. Think about how long that will take you. You wait six months, only to get rejected. Do it again. Wait six months. Get rejected. Do it again. And again, and again, and again. Now we get to talk about acceptance rates, to REALLY make this all sound dire.
ACCEPTANCE RATES
Here are the Top 25 HARDEST to get into, also from Duotrope:
1. Fantasy & Science Fiction (F&SF) (0.2 %)
2. Glimmer Train Stories (0.3 %)
3. Ninth Letter (0.3 %)
4. Missouri Review (0.3 %)
5. Clarkesworld Magazine (0.4 %)
6. Kenyon Review (0.6 %)
7. Narrative Magazine (0.6 %)
8. Pedestal Magazine (0.7 %)
9. Willow Springs (0.7 %)
10. Mid-American Review (0.8 %)
11. Hobart (Print) (0.8 %)
12. Analog Science Fiction & Fact (0.8 %)
13. McSweeney’s Internet Tendency (0.8 %)
14. Strange Horizons (0.9 %)
15. Atlantic Monthly, The (0.9 %)
16. Hayden’s Ferry Review (0.9 %)
17. Colorado Review (0.9 %)
18. DIAGRAM (1.1 %)
19. Black Warrior Review (1.1 %)
20. Shimmer (1.2 %)
21. Gulf Coast (1.2 %)
22. Futurismic (1.2 %)
23. upstreet TEMP CLOSED (1.2 %)
24. failbetter.com (1.2 %)
25. GUD: Greatest Uncommon Denominator (1.3 %)
Notice something in common? The top 25 are all at about 1%. That means 99% percent get rejected. And that doesn’t even include the listings that are at a big fat ZERO, they don’t show up at all. Again, some big names in here – F&SF, Glimmer Train, Missouri Review, Clarkesworld, Kenyon, Narrative, Hobart, Analog, McSweeney’s, Atlantic, Colorado Review, Black Warrior, GUD – an elite list that most of us would KILL to be on.
So, if we add this acceptance rate of 1% to the six month waiting period, how long is that damn story of yours going to take to finally break through? Something like FIFTY YEARS, right? Well screw that, I might as well get drunk and watch bad tv.
GOOD COMPANY:
Bummed out yet? Don’t be. There is hope. And I don’t mean just send your work to much easier places. I mean, you’re in good company. Of those 25 HARDEST to get into, how many do you think are NO SIMULTANEOUS SUBMISSIONS? Only NINE. So the rest, they get it, and they find a way to deal with it. At least those on THIS list with NSS policies are fast. The eight that do require you to submit to them, and only them (F&SF, Clarkesworld, Analog, McSweeney’s Internet, Strange Horizons, Atlantic, Shimmer, and Futurismic) have a range of 3 days up to 44 days. Most are in the 15-30 day range. A very reasonable time, in my opinion, and certainly not six months.
GOOD COMPANY EXAMPLE:
Here is a quote from Orchid: A Literary Review that about sums it up for me.
“…and, yes, we do consider simultaneous submissions. After all, we’ve heard that the average story is submitted twenty (or more) times and rejected twenty (or more) times before being published. At that rate, without simultaneously submitting, it would take at least five years to place a story. That just seems mean.”
BAD COMPANY:
So we feel better now, a little bit anyway, having seen that some of the top publications (in a wide range of genres too) get it, and are for SS. But go back to that first list, those that take the LONGEST. Here are the real culprits, and I’ll give my thoughts on them in a second.
Of those first 25, the SLOWEST to respond, how many do you think are ALSO no SS? Luckily only SIX:
Sniplits – 387 (SNIPLITS? What the hell?)
Ascent – 184
Coyote – 177
Yale – 170
Antioch – 157
Dark Recesses – 147
For some of these, it may be that they are understaffed, or for the journals, tied to a university, away for the summer. But really? I forgive none of them.
NOVELS:
This one is tough. I can ALMOST understand why some presses would have this policy, but COME ON. This is even MORE of a situation that calls for NO simultaneous submission. I don’t care if you run it past two interns, a co-editor, the editor and up the ladder to the CEO and whatever other yahoos at the top have to read it. Do you know how hard it is to publish a novel? Again, I think it is in that 1% range. And we spend YEARS writing our novels. I don’t think I’ve ever taken more than three months to write a short story and most of that is just trying to fix little things. Some stories CAN take years to perfect, but it’s not like you’re working several hours a day and writing 60,000-100,000 words. I can’t bend on this.
Now…I’m not talking about somebody asking for an “exclusive” or the “full manuscript”. I think if you are having an open conversation with an agent or publisher you should tell the truth. I just went through this with an agent on the east coast. I told her my novel Transubstantiate was at a couple of presses and she said fine. I sent her a synopsis, she asked for a chapter. She came here, read it, and said send the whole thing. I sent it to her, with the promise that she would read it in THIRTY days, and she kept her word. She rejected it in THIRTY days, right on time.
And what are the odds? What are the odds that TWO publishers will actually decide to publish your novel? Unless you are really successful, and are in some sort of bidding war or actually are in a position where you know your book will sell, if you make a living at it…but that’s not what I’m talking about. The worst case scenario if two presses want it…you just burned a bridge. The odds are just too much against us for me to worry about that. But I can almost understand it.
SOLUTION:
I had an interesting talk with Beth over at Shimmer. I’d sent in a query because my story was 6800 words, and they ask for you to do that for anything over 5000 words. Now, I like what Shimmer is doing, but I made the mistake of saying that this story was indeed at other publications. She refused to even read my query. I understand that, completely. But I asked her some follow up questions, basically wondering why Shimmer was a no simultaneous submission publication. Her response?
“I’m sorry you find this inconvenient, and hope you find success with the publishers who work according to your expectations.”
Wow. Is that a bit snarky or is it just me? I can’t tell sometimes. I wasn’t asking her to bend to my whim, or change their policy simply to please me (although that would have been nice) I was just curious as to WHY they adopted this policy when so many publications were NOT doing it that way anymore. Was it staff, number of submissions, too many horror stories about accepting a story only to find it gone when they got back to you six months later? At least Shimmer is fast, only taking 10 days.
What to do? Here are a couple of solutions:
1. SCREW THEM.
What nerve. Who are these people to make me wait six months, with a 1% acceptance rate? That’s cruel and I won’t stand for it. So, don’t submit to them. Avoid them, they’ll never run your work anyway, and because of their attitude, they are now officially ignored.
or more reasonably
2. RESPECT IT.
Put those guys up front, especially those that are fast. Send it out, and wait 10 days. That’s not so bad. Spend the first three months of your submissions targeting those top places with fast response times. I’ve done that before with F&SF, Clarkesworld, Cemetery Dance, and others.
or
3. TIME IT
So I entered a story, “Victimized” this 6800 word neo-noir thriller into the recent BOMB contest. Now, I know that my odds of winning are slim and none. BUT…maybe the editor really likes dark, rich stories, or maybe it could place, and still get published. So I have two choices. Submit and wait for 4-5 months OR…(and this is what I did) TIME IT. What do I mean? Let me explain.
Say you are sending out your best story ever to about 10 places that you really love, that seem like a good fit. Most of them are in the 1% acceptance range, maybe a couple in the 5% range, some in the 10% range. One, BOMB is having a contest, and is NO SIMULTANEOUS SUBMISSIONS. Figure out (ie, Duotrope again) what the AVERAGE time is for all of these, and then send them out so that they all hit on about the same date. If BOMB is the longest at say 120 days, send it first. Five are at 90 days, so send them in a month. The other five are 30 days, so wait a couple months, then send them out. They’ll all hit on or about the same day. And that way you don’t wait for years, and still get a shot at those hard to break into magazines. We just need to be realistic with 1% acceptance rates.
And when NONE of them take it…start all over again with the next tier of magazines and journals until your story finds a home. NEVER give up.
*NOTE: And don’t forget about online fiction. It used to be a taboo, a blemish or sorts, the last place to put your work. No so anymore. Many “literary” and award winning publications and universities are adding in an online presence OR even going to ONLY online. Maybe for additional exposure, or maybe to save money. I think Dogmatika.com, WordRiot.com, OpiumMagazine.com and 3:AMMagazine.com are all doing really great work, just to name a few. Dzanc Books just added TheCollagist.com with Matt Bell at the helm. It’s great exposure, and when somebody asks “Got something I can read?” you just send them over.
And the last option…
4. IGNORE IT.
I’ve asked a lot of my fellow writers, and most of them do ignore it. I’ve asked published authors, professors, editors and other esteemed professionals and most say just ignore it. Think of the odds. I mean, F&SF and Clarkesworld are going to be fighting over my story? And BOTH will accept it at the same time? It’ll never happen. At least, not until I’m very successful, and at that time, I may not worry about it. Or maybe they’ll be soliciting ME by then. There is always the risk of getting placed on some BLACKLIST, but I’ve never heard of such a thing. And I’ve never been in a position where two places accepted a story at the exact same time. As long as you send off a withdraw notice immediately, you should be fine. And many times, in doing that, I’ve gotten into conversations with editors, talking about my work, and/or where it did end up, and now that I’ve got a bit more of a personal relationship with this editor, I may stand out when I submit. “Oh, that dysfunctional Richard submitted again. Gather around all, lets see what insanity he sent in this time. Elephant penis? Modern vampire tale?”
CONCLUSION:
It’s up to you how to submit, what stories to send to each publication, and how you abide by the rules. Or not. I personally think that the NO SIMULTANEOUS SUBMISSION guideline should be abolished. It’s hard enough out here for us struggling writers without this rule. We need every break we can get.
ALTERNATE OPINION:
Visit http://larina.wordpress.com/2009/08/30/simsubs/ and see what Larina has to say. I don’t know what her post is going to be, we haven’t talked at all, so it’ll be interesting to see what arguments she presents. Be kind.
Peace,
Richard
Dreamland Comics – Libertyville, IL
Posted on August 23, 2009 Leave a Comment
I met with the owner, Dave Gray, the other day to talk about a little co-op work. I live in Mundelein, IL which is just west of Libertyville, IL. What a great guy. He’s going to help promote my blog and writing and I’m going to talk about his shop.
First, these guys are sincere and passionate about what they do. They’re really into what they do, and it shows. They have a fantastic selection, and treat their customers with respect. I’m not the biggest comic collector, but have gone in here repeatedly to get some Gunslinger comics (the Stephen King adapted works) and they’ve even set aside some of the limited variants for me. If you live in the area, or even if you don’t, and need a good source for all of your comic, graphic novel and other related need, check out their website and order up. I love walking in here. I had to actually leave my wallet in the car so that I wouldn’t blow my paycheck – so many cool classic comics, new edgy graphic novels, and everything in between.
I do read a few titles. Was into the 100 BULLETS series, obviously the GUNSLINGER stuff. I picked up a little AEON FLUX, since I loved the MTV series, WATCHMEN of course, and some other random bits, Paul Pope’s work, such as 100%, SANDMAN, FABLES, Y: THE LAST MAN. Guess I’m more of a VERTIGO guy.
Stop by the store, give these guys a call or check out their website at http://www.dreamland-comics.com as they are sure to have what you need.
• New Comics
• Back Issues
• Comic and Card Supplies
• Role-Playing Games
• Sports Cards
• Warhammer 40K
• Collectible Card Games
• Action Figures
INFORMATION:
105 West Rockland Road
Libertyville, IL 60048
1 (847) 680-0727
Fax: 1 (847) 680-4495
info@dreamland-comics.com
HOURS
Monday: 10 a.m. to 5 p.m.
Tuesday: 10 a.m to 5 p.m.
Wednesday: 10 a.m. to 8 p.m.
Thursday: 10 a.m. to 8 p.m.
Friday: 10 a.m. to 8 p.m.
Saturday: 10 a.m. to 6 p.m.
Sunday: 12 p.m. to 5 p.m.






